It has been two weeks since it happened. And I know for sure (I would even wager for it) that not a thing would ever pluck that memory (or even the bit of its bits) out of me.
Folks, *drum roll please* I just earned a degree. ^_^
Honestly, I never thought I would make it. I’m not speaking of a graduate’s typical statement here. I actually never really thought I’d make my way through. You know for a fact that I don’t love my course; I never really did. What worsened the scenario amidst my struggle to survive was a message I encountered somewhere that conveyed something like “you surely will succeed if you find your heart in it”. Great, I needed that. Urgh. So yeah, that muddled me. That planted a negative seed in me – “oh so this is not going to work then…” “I won’t make it through…” “I’ll disappoint my family and relatives who expect so much from me”… “blah blahs”.
So that the entire journey was not smooth at all. There had been a lot of bumps, cliffs, and rocky parts. I remember staring at our discussing professor with whatever he says merely repelling and bouncing away from my head. I remember the nights when I just break down because what I read and compute do not leave the slightest trace on my brain (to the extent that I literally forget what I have just read when I try to get back to it a couple of minutes later). I remember those difficult exams that leave me either doodling or merely staring at the testpapers. But for every single hardship I had dealt with, every single hardwork emanated.
Throughout this whole journey, there are certain things that I learned.
1. Don’t give up.
In life, we always come face-to-face with hardships. Subsequently, it is inevitable that we get worn off in the course of dealing with them, but let’s not allow these temporary hardships to permanently rule and win over us. We shouldn’t give up. Let’s fight against these hardships using our hardworks. And just a tip, in times of crisis, think of the people you love. They could actually fuel you up. 🙂
2. Do not entertain even a percent of negativity.
To make it short, stay positive. Even when things are rough, just be optimistic. Our minds are powerful. You attract what you think, they say. And I could really attest to that. 🙂 Have you ever watched The Secret? If not yet, I recommend you do. Please do. I would have discussed number two here, but please just watch The Secret directly. You’d understand it more there. And I hope and pray it will change your perceptions in life, just like it did to me.
3. God has better plans for us.
It was a week before the official start of classes when mother and I resorted to enrolling in this course. Yes, we didn’t have any choices left and since many of my high school friends chose this, I counted myself in. I actually had many other plans for myself but I ended up in this realm. This was never really in my vocabulary and even the least course that I would ever take, but for some reason, He put me here.
Things may not turn out the way we want them to be. Well, maybe, it is not the right time for such things to happen yet. Do not feel dejected. Instead, pacify your troubled hearts by believing that He is still actually reserving something bigger and better for you. 🙂
4. God is always there for us.
Whatever problem and challenges we maybe dealing with, we will always be able to solve and surpass them. He is a loving God. If He puts us to it, He’d put us through it. He’s just by our side; He never abandons us. Faith, my dear friend, faith, as what Sir Paulo Coelho said, shows us that we are never alone.
In life, if we just sacrifice and trust Him, we will surely be reaping the fruits of our labor. And in my case, after four-and-a-half struggling years, I, together with all my classmates who also had the same kind of years, recently marched on the stage with big smiles on our faces as the university president handed us our oh-so-longed diplomas . 🙂
Graduation, I have thought, is not about graduating with flying colors. Graduation is about rewarding your parents and the people who support you for being with you all throughout your journey, supporting you, encouraging you, and believing in you. But He is just so gracious – He gave me a bonus. And by bonus, I mean flying colors. 🙂 Thank you, Lord. I just simply asked to graduate, but you gave me more.
And oh would I ever forget? Mama told me that when she first saw my toga (she actually really just saw it hours before the graduation ceremony because I stayed in a boarding house near the university and I just kept the toga there), she hugged it and shed tears of joy. I went like ‘Oh, maaaa.’ when she told me that. Nobody saw her do that, she said. And so as not in violation of our No Secret Policy, she confessed such to me. I felt happy because she was happy.
Ma, I know how grateful you are for having me as your daughter. But ma, I’m more than grateful that you are my number one supporter.
And that you are my mother.
I love you so much, ma. And aside from Him, this is for you. 🙂
PS Next chapter please! 🙂
Status: Juanimel Pogoy now signing off from college. 🙂